It's A Wonderful Life

CRI/LEP lecture on JOY!

Last Wednesday, Gary, a nurse and certified health and wellness coach from Berkshire Medical Center gave a half-hour presentation on joy!  Finding joy in your life. He mentioned that joy is a universal need, and that it has aspects which are good for our health - like autonomy, feeling connected to others, honesty, sense of purpose, peace and physical well being with play time.  Gary mentioned that joy creates emotion and if you take the "e" out you're left with motion....

We were shown a video of the Japanese Snow Monkeys. I guess it was to show the connectedness they have with each other in their family/social groups and also to make us laugh with their monkeying around.  We also did some interactive fun exercises with drums and keeping a beating pattern, we wore red clown noses (that were pretty silly), and practiced laughing.  I must say it did lighten up the mood.   Our Rx for finding joy in life was:  1. Have fun, 2. Be present, and 3. Let go and enjoy.   I guess that's not a bad list to remember.

So now let me tell you about yesterday and how I think it relates to what I'm learning in the CRI program.

A friend died this past March.  I sang in Bach with him and his wife for at least a decade.  He was a prominent psychiatrist in the area and was one of the nicest people you could ever meet.  He and his wife made a wonderful couple, raising 5 children? not quite sure but I can name five. They just lived a life filled with beauty: music and art and nature.  Their children are artists, musicians, science and math pros and extraordinary people. Their grandchildren are equally diverse in their talents and I enjoyed talking with them at the memorial service and at the family home after the service.

The program of service paid tribute to this wonderful human being.  I got to sing in the choir, two big pieces one by Brahms and the other from the Mozart Requiem.  What gave me joy was to be able to participate in the way I knew him best, through classical music.  But what also was extraordinary was the shape of the program for the service.  It honored my friend in so many ways, with tributes from his grandchildren, colleagues, son-in-law and sons.  One son a poet and musician sang songs from  Ritchie Havens and John Coltrane.  The words written by this son were so perfect...it made you want to cry but the joy lifted it to a higher place.  I've attended a hundred funerals and memorial services and this one was something special.  And I've learned in the CRI program about sound and vibrations helping to get us focused. This service started with a professional gong ringer.  He had many Asian gongs and sound devices and "played" for about 5 minutes, with us listening and centering and relaxing into the rhythm and almost tone-less sound.  It was amazing!

I went to the family house afterwards where the joy and celebration took on a new dimension.  They have a large old clapboard house, the kind with creaking wooden floors and a yard beyond expectations with forty-foot clusters of lilacs in bloom, and peonies ready to burst.  Inside the house the rooms were ample and the front parlor had a grand piano and harpsichord.  Food was placed in two rooms off the parlor and a screen porch had the drinks.  There were seats for anyone who wanted one, not any that had to be rented, just a home filled with a life of cherished possessions, real comfy chairs.

So back to the connection of the Canyon Ranch Institute and Fairview program.  This feeling of joy came over me, just watching the joy of this extended family.  It reminded me of the play You Can't Take It With You by George S. Kaufman and Moss Hart.  It's about a family who have so many odd interests but love each others eccentricities.

Conversations drifted from group to group, someone started playing the piano and groups of guests and family sang song after song.  Grandchildren raced from room to room. Food was in a buffet style, but that was just the hors d'oeuvres!  Someone announced that dinner was ready!  Ham, and salad and vegetable side dishes,  all yummy.  

The evening ended with me watching a HUGE bonfire be lit in the far end of the back yard.  It nearly caught the trees on fire, but it was something my friend had always done.  Make a big bonfire, and the family honored that and my guess is they will always do that.  What joy, what a beautiful family and a lasting legacy.

Little by little the CRI information is creeping into my daily thoughts and experiences.  I hope we will keep the joy in our own lives.

Meeting the RN

I had a meeting with an ER nurse named Rich.  He was very nice.  We had an hour for our meeting, and he had all the lab results,  and had read through the my 100 question questionnaire!  Well, I was prepared!! I had my paperwork, my blood work results and an index card with my questions for him.  I was on the mission to find out about my C Reactive Protein and the inflammation going on in my body.  I was armed with the tests you thought I might consider and my friend Leigh had suggestions too.

I launched into my questions.  Rich was thoughtful but found a way to get me centered and not so overly focused on my lab results.  He also spent time talking to me about the additional blood tests I thought could help me in my quest for a lower CRP.  In short, Rich was concerned that the tests I thought could help, would be non-specific tests and that if I did have them I still might not find out why my CRP is 9.5.  Of course he also mentioned that I should talk to my doctor, but what he was trying to do was shift my laser focus on these tests.  He mentioned that lab values change all the time, that laboratories can show different results.  And what if I did take a test and a new health concern was uncovered, I might be chasing a rabbit into a hole.

What I really discovered when I think about the hour visit, is how I am not a relaxed sort.  I could hear myself babbling and racing ahead with questions, and statements and what I've been reading, and what I've been discussing.  It all really started to seem obsessive and anxious and not at all calm.  Probably everyone in the study has the same mental state.  I mentioned about the food, food, and more food,  what I think is really out of whack is my mental state.

In the tire metaphor for this program, the tires needing the most inflating this week and maybe forever is the MIND and FEELING.

I want this program to go faster, "just cut to the chase" kind of deal.  I have a lot of thoughts on a whole lot of healing...and I'm using my good buddies like you to supplement my rapid improvement.  I'm heading to be a poster child for wellness, I'm on the fast track.  But.....I'm not calm, not peaceful, and my behavior shows my possible attention deficit disorder.  (I'm diagnosing myself here).  My mind scrambles, flitting from one new source on wellness to another.  I scared myself by watching a  Dr. Oz youtube video of his health show focusing on the CRP and how I was heading for a coronary heart attack.  I then looked at a site about knowing the symptoms of having a heart attack.  ownahealthyheart.com   oh good God!  Well, I didn't get a good night's sleep that night.

Rich did his best and was very, very good and bringing me back to the integrative approach.  Setting small goals was better than just saying "I want to lose weight",  that's too vague.  It might be an ultimate goal but setting mini-goals will help make the ultimate possible.  We came up with strategies and and a longer time frame with which to reach goals.  He was glad L and I are working on the exercise portion by walking nearly every day. He suggested that I meet with the nutritionist next. So that meeting will be set up soon.

I think if the MIND and FEELING tires can get some inflating, the BODY tire will come along maybe easier, and the SENSE OF PURPOSE tire will have room to inflate.  It sounds corny but I think this is a program that came into my life at the right time.